Children go to school for reading, writing and arithmetic—learning the big 3. Sure your children go to school to learn those basics, as well as history, social studies, foreign languages, literature, art, music. But not every child learns at the same pace as every other child. Some children can hear the material or read the material once and ace a test, while other children can make As only after reading the material several times, lots of repetition and prolonged study.
Each child’s learning ability is an individual thing, something as unique to them as their eye color or sense of humor. As parents, it’s all too easy to make quick judgments about a child’s intelligence or even interest and dedication in school by their grades or the amount of time spent studying. When what’s really important is to determine a child’s learning style and ability and work with them to make school a rewarding experience, whether they struggle for Cs or barely crack the books and manage As.
First, realize that your attitude goes a long way towards your child’s success or failure in school. Do you talk about school and learning in a positive way, or are you negative when talking about your school experiences or current school policies? Children learn mostly from you, so they can adapt your attitudes and opinions without even realizing it. Welcome learning into your own life. Get enthusiastic about discover new things, and your child will likely do the same.
Second, when your child brings home grade reports, measure your reactions. Of course it’s appropriate to praise for great grades. But you know your child. How hard did he or she have to work for that C? Some children’s learning ability is simply a little slower than others, so a child that worked hard for a B or C deserves your praise, too. Don’t automatically be negative, too, if the grades are lower. It’s not something you should punish for or scorn the child over—low grades are indication of a problem that needs to be addressed, nothing more.
If you’re concerned with your child’s grades, talk to the child and the child’s teachers to get more insight to the problem. Sometimes, learning itself isn’t the issue, but getting assignments turned in can drop a grade that might have been a B very quickly to a C, D or even a failing mark. Missed assignments are clear signs that organization might be the problem. You can make sure there’s a designated time and place for homework each night, then make sure each assignment is completed and in the child’s backpack, ready to turn in the next day.
If lack of understanding is the reason for the grades, then you can help explain the assignments and concepts when your child is doing homework, or you can hire a tutor to help in that subject. If you suspect a learning disability, talk to your child’s doctor.
