A potentially heartbreaking story comes to us via the East Oregonian newspaper. Kay Rene Reed Qualls and DeeAnn Angell Shafer are two women with normal lives, children and grandchildren, and until last Summer, no idea that they weren’t their parents’ biological children.
Apparently, born on the same day — May 3, 1953 — in the same hospital, there was some sort of mix-up, and the two babies were given to the wrong parents. The mother of one of the two actually insisted that the child she’d been given wasn’t hers, but her concern was ignored, and probably attributed to the stresses of childbirth.
Decades later, an 86 year old woman who was familiar with both families contacted the brother of one of the two switched, and related the story. DNA tests followed and it was confirmed. Both women had been given to the wrong parents.
Before you start thinking about the possible sadness and missed opportunities inherent in this scenario, let’s give some time to remembering that both women are happily married with grandkids of their own. While it might have been helpful to know if there were congenital health issues for each family to be aware of when the girls were growing up, it’s likely that they’re both healthy. In my mind, this is no different a situation than adopted children. People like to debate the Nature vs. Nurture argument, but one thing is clear: biological child or not, everyone needs love to thrive.
This story seems to prove that there is no essential benefit or drawback to being raised by someone other than your biological parents, as long as you are given the love and support you need to grow. I’d be willing to bet that this happens more frequently than is discovered, but a new baby is an empty slate. It has no preconceived notions of what its parents should be; it only knows it needs to be loved. I’m happy that this mistake was unearthed, if for no other reason than it might help quell some quiet, nagging doubts, if there were any. The truth should always come to light. But at the end of the day, it’s who chooses to love you that’s important, not who is supposed to.
Comments
No comments.