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Polyamory On The Rise

By Akela Talamasca on July 29th, 2009

groupholdhands_450x350Polyamory is the practice of having multiple loving relationships at one time. It’s not about sleeping around casually, it’s about broadening the scope of what it means to be committed to another person. While this is by no means a new phenomenon, it’s only recently that the media outlets have begun reporting upon it.

In a group of polyamorous adults, it’s not unusual for any number of them to be parents. This proves to be a sticking point with conservative groups, as they feel that children should not be exposed to alternative lifestyles beyond two-partner monogamy. Of course, it’s easy for an outside observer to make all manner of false claims about things they haven’t experienced personally. Uneducated people like to trot out the word “perverted” when exposed to something outside of their personal comfort zone, but there is nothing perverted about polyamory.

Let’s remember that as parents, we are our children’s first filter through which they perceive the world. If we tell them that something is wrong, they will generally believe it, and repeat that opinion to their friends, and possibly continue to carry it through their adolescent years. But they have to be told something is wrong; they don’t automatically think that way about things that don’t scare or hurt them.

Children of polyamorous parents receive just as much love as monogamous parented children do — much more, in fact, when you consider the love coming in from the “extra” parents. And as a group dynamic, nothing could please a child more than to have more attention given to them. Monogamy is a lifestyle choice that will probably never go away, but it’s important to remember that it is no more holy or “right” than any other choice consenting adults can make. Let the circumstances — and the children — decide what’s proper, and try to leave uninformed opinions out of it.


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