Christmas TV shows and movies have always liked to throw in a lesson here and there. “A Charlie Brown Christmas” railed against the commercialism taking over the holiday, while “Miracle on 34th Street” taught us to kick cynicism to the curb and let ourselves believe again. But take a closer look at these and other holiday classics and you might pick up on some darker hidden messages:
“Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer”
Hidden message:
Santa’s an $#*@.
I mean, Santa should top the list of nonjudgmental people, right? Nope. He disgustedly puts his big balding head in his hands when forced to listen to his elves singing, and just look at what he did to Rudolph. That reindeer had the most flight skills of his peers, but Santa still shut him out because of his ruddy schnoz. Oh, but the the fat man knew who to turn to when a blizzard threatened to cancel Christmas. If I were Rudolph, I would have told him where he could put that sleigh.
“Miracle on 34th Street”
Hidden message:
Kids are ungrateful brats.
So it takes almost the entire movie for little Susan Walker to come around and believe her elderly friend Kris Kringle is really Santa Claus and not some crazy old nut. But it takes all of two seconds for Susan’s faith to be shaken when she thinks he didn’t get her the house she wanted for Christmas. Not a dollhouse, but an actual house. Kris comes through in the end, but I feel real sorry for the man Susan marries when she grows up.
“How the Grinch Stole Christmas”
Hidden message:
Loners are creepy and messed up.
Consider it a psychological case study: You have an unmarried guy who lives alone in a cave atop Mt. Crumpit with his dog. He gets upset because his neighbors down the way are happy, so he breaks into all their houses and steals their stuff. You could make this a slightly more realistic tale by having the Grinch live in the basement of his parents’ house and work for a Whoville IT company.
“A Charlie Brown Christmas”
Hidden message:
Christmastime is depression time.
Poor Charlie Brown. He can take a wonderful season like Christmas and turn it into a problem. Actually, if you watch any of the other “Peanuts” specials, you realize that this is his M.O. He definitely needs more help than Lucy and her little psychiatry booth are able to provide.
