As soon as I was old enough to write my name, my mom would sit me down at the dining room table after Christmas or my birthday to write thank you cards to every one who had sent me gifts. I hated doing it, I didn’t know who half the people were or what to say to them, but now that I am older, I am eternally grateful that she taught me such a valuable lesson.
When I became a teenager, my friends’ parents would gush about what a responsible and gracious young girl I was. My extended family would rave to my cousins how loving I was to keep the lines of communication open, and what a polite young adult I was turning into. Now, into my twenties, I realize on my own how nice it is to feel appreciated when you have gone out of your way to do something nice for someone, and to recognize it with that extra personal touch of a thank you card is a great way to make, keep and deepen relationships.
Aside from just being the right thing to do, it’s a valuable tool to teach your children when and how to say thank you.
If you don’t already have your children write thank you cards, this holiday is the best place to start.
The actual writing of the Thank You card will depend widely on how old your child is:
If they can only sign their name, or something close to it, it is best to write the thank you for them and have them sign the card. It’s always sweet to write it as if you were them, saying, “Thank you so much for the toy truck this Christmas, Grandma. I love playing with it!” and have your little boy sign underneath. You can also have them draw a picture to include for more of their own personal touch.
For kids old enough to write, dictate to them a nice message to write in the card in their own handwriting, or if they want, let them go at it themselves. Tell them not to seal the envelope, however, because sometimes even in Thank You cards, your child will forget to write the words ‘thank you.’
Teens can be a bit more adult about it, so encourage them to elaborate. Have them include how their holiday was, anything interesting that happened, and offer a well wish to the recipient hoping they had a great holiday, too.
A few thoughts:
Before writing the cards, first make a list of everyone that gave anything this year- even if it was ‘just’ a card. This way no one is forgotten and everyone is recognized.
It’s also nice to follow up with a phone call to say thanks to relatives and close friends. Let your child dial and thank the giver in person, so your child can hear how happy it makes them feel that they have been thoughtful enough to say thanks. That warm feeling they get will have them saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ without prodding for the next few weeks.
My mother always taught me to never thank for ‘money’ always thank for the ‘the gift.’ It’s a personal decision, but gift makes it sound as if it had more value than just the dollar amount.
