A teen and tween’s social life is very important to them, and inevitably, as your precious youngster grows, they are going to want to spend less and less time at home. New Years Eve is party central and your children are probably begging you to go out with friends. Of course you want your children to have fun, but your first priority is to keep them safe and, on such a big night, there are a few things to keep in mind:
- According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, teenagers are more likely to use drugs or alcohol when they are with their pees.
- According to the National Highway Traffic and Safety Administration, 15-20 year-olds are the leading age group involved in traffic accidents, the leading cause of death for the age group.
- According to Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD) and the National Safety Council, the holiday season, Thanksgiving through New Year’s Day, is when the most traffic accidents involving teens occur, most involving alcohol.
- According to the most recent Youth Risk Behavior Survey by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention 75 percent of high school students have tried alcohol at least once.
Sit down and talk about alcohol. Before your child leaves for the night, talk to your teen about their thoughts on alcohol, and what they think the tone of the night will be. Just because your child says they don’t want to drink, if they feel that peer pressure will be everywhere, they may not be able to withstand it. Let them know the dangers, the repercussions and the health risks of underage drinking, and let them know that no matter what, if they are caught in a situation they don’t know how to handle, they can rely on you to come get them.
Know the plan. Make sure you know the entire plan for the night. If your child is young and going to sleep over, make sure the parents will be home, you know the family, no alcohol is permitted in the house, and you have the phone number and address of the house. If your teen is going to a party, you will need the same information and then some. Make sure you know who is driving, exactly where they will be headed (are they picking up people along the way, what are the plans afterward) if parents will be home, if alcohol will be present and know exactly what time they will be home.
Don’t assume anything. Don’t assume that just because your child is still in middle school that alcohol will not be present. Any child can sneak in some alcohol in a backpack to a sleep over, and kids are exposed to such behaviors at a younger age. Don’t assume that parents will be present, or even know about the party. Many parents go out on New Years and have different values and rules than you. Don’t assume that an adult will be driving, as many kids have older siblings on their own way out willing to lend a ride and don’t assume that your child will be staying where they say the whole night. Just because they are spending the night at a friend’s house doesn’t mean they won’t hit a party first.
Check to be sure. You may feel like you are invading your child’s privacy, but it’s better they be mad for a bit and know you love them, then something horrible happen. Check your alcohol supply in the house before they leave, if you have one. Make it clear to older siblings that it is, under no circumstances, OK to supply their younger siblings with alcohol. Call the house at a reasonable hour, just to make sure your child is there, along with an adult. Speak with the parent directly- your child will never know you checked up, and by calling the house instead of their cell phone, there is no way they can lie. Also beware that some parents have no problems with co-ed sleepovers, so depending on your values, ask questions accordingly.
Still nervous? Host your own party. You can set the rules, watch the kids and monitor the activities that happen in your house. Other parents will appreciate having a place their children can go to have fun where they don’t have to worry about them, and you will feel great knowing that everyone is safe. Just be prepared for a sleepless night of giggling and blaring movies.
