By now, Dan Rather’s comment on Sunday’s “Chris Matthews Show” has been bandied about by the mainstream press, and viewed by all angles. Some think the comment — that President Obama ” … couldn’t sell watermelons if you gave him the state troopers to flag down the traffic” — was entirely racist, while others construe it as being merely a poor choice of words. Whatever your personal belief, it’s clear that the current political climate is more strained than it’s ever been, and that so much exacting care must be taken when speaking publicly that it’s almost not worth speaking at all.
Sadly, this is the kind of world in which we have to raise our children. A seemingly casual, flippant remark, made in innocence, can easily backfire and turn the speaker into something perceived as malevolent. It’s no longer enough to say “That’s not what I meant”; we have to edit ourselves before saying anything at all.
However, we should be teaching our children this lesson anyway. If a child inadvertently hurts another’s feelings, she might say “I didn’t mean to”, but the result speaks for itself. It’s a sign that, good intentions or ill, mistakes sometimes get made. Maybe you didn’t mean to hurt someone, but you did, and now you know better. This is good for growth. We can’t expect a five year old to be aware of her strength, or limitations, or boundaries at all times. She’s learning from experience, which is the best teacher. But we can show that there are always consequences for every action, whether purposefully made or accidental. There is always room for apologies, and a genuine desire to make amends, which is, in the end, the most important issue.
